Sunday, February 7, 2010

Will a Gay Go Help Her?: Sequins Squandered

Peggy Fleming won the Olympic gold medal in women's figure skating in 1968. Here she is in all her modest elegance, an Audrey Hepburn in ice! Never has a mock turtleneck looked so lovely.

Also pictured in Rachael Flatt, the current US women's champion and Olympic team member. Her dress reminds me of the wallpaper in a Chinatown dim sum cafe.

Will a gay go help her?

The Appeal of Sandra

I think we are all tired of freaks, "divas", and the overly tanned. Real Housewives are a bore, and Celebrities in Rehab are depressing--I thought I had it bad! Lingerie models in catalogs look like triathletes in lace, teenagers on "Gossip Girl" seem 45 at the youngest, and who knows how old Regis is--115? 125? Nothing is normal anymore. Except for Sandra Bullock.

What a relief to see an actress (other than Meryl Streep, Our Lady of Real Talent) look so lovely and have such success in middle age! Plus, she doesn't get arrested. Brava, Miss Bullock!

Will a Gay Go Help Her?: Dress Dish

Hi folks. January got away from me. Well hell, 2009 got away from me! But Britney Spears always pulls me back in...

Britney is still searching for her "look." Madonna has her ripped body and black lace; Pam Anderson has her breasts and child-sized clothes; Posh has her skeleton. Britney is still taking advice from others, and it shows. This mess of a dress would ONLY look good on one person--6-feet tall model Gisele Bundchen. This 50's undies-under-lace-midi-slip needs a tall frame and thin limbs to pull off. Britney's gymnast's body looks too stocky and cut off. I am sure that Brit Brit is tiny in person, but this dress make her look thick in the wrong way (for thick in the RIGHT way, see Beyonce).

Will some gay go help her?

Thursday, December 3, 2009

It's Coat Weather!

Baby, it's cold outside! And thank the Lord! I love when it's chilly enough to wear a wig or hair piece and not feel too hot, you know?

Coats are such a blessing. They cover a multitude of sins: a crummy outfit, holiday bloat, stains. Miss Dita Von Teese it pictured here in a fab holiday wrap, and what an inspiration she is! Deck the halls indeed!

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Tiger Woods Had Sex With Women Who Are Not Naturally Blonde

Tiger Woods' wife Elin has the brightest blonde hair in the world, the sort of spun-into-silk golden tresses that can only be created by Scandinavian DNA. When you marry THAT sort of uber-blonde, it's all down hill after the wedding photos. And she's NATURALLY flaxen--the rarest of flowers. Not a whiff of skank about that Elin--she is sweet and pretty! She has never been on a reality show! How can a man play at that high a level? He can't. Tiger flew too close to the Midnight Sun. He's not a god--he's a golfer. And a sorta dorky looking one at that! It was just a matter of time before he slept with dingy-tressed cocktail waitresses with L'Oreal Home Highlights. Poor guy. He was raised on Playboy, not Bergman films... all he can do now is buy Elin a big diamond, spend a few weeks waiting on her hand and foot, and let her send the kids to school in Sweden. You broke it, you buy it, Tiger!

Saturday, November 7, 2009

Yes Ma'am, He Found Me In A Honky Tonk

Want some good old fashioned advice? Check out Leona William's song "I'm Too Good To Be Better Than Nothing", on her "New Patches" CD! I heard it just today and it knocked me out. So I thought, why do I know that name...and I found a very special lady!

Hailing from the small town of Vienna, Missouri, Leona Williams landed her first radio show at the age of 15 in Jefferson City, Missouri. This was the beginning of a lifetime in country music. She moved to Nashville in the 1960’s, and was soon recording for several major record labels with such hits as “Once More”, “Yes Ma'am, He Found Me In A Honky Tonk”, “Country Girl With Hot Pants On” and “Broadminded.”

Leona played upright bass and sang harmony for Loretta Lynn. During this time, she and Lynn became close friends and traveled throughout the country with each other. Loretta recorded Leona's composition "Get What You Got and Go."

Leona later teamed up with Merle Haggard for a top ten duet called “The Bull and the Beaver”; they married in 1978. During this time, she would write some of Merle’s biggest hits including “You Take Me For Granted” and “Someday When Things Are Good.” You can hear her harmony vocals on some of Merle's hits such as “The Way I Am”, “The Roots Of My Raising” and “Big City.” Merle and Leona were divorced in 1984.

Leona married songwriter Dave Kirby and moved back to Vienna, Missouri. She continues to work the road and has released three CDs on her own Loveshine label.

Leona's songs have been recorded by many artists including Tammy Wynette, Randy Travis, Moe Bandy, Ray Price, Loretta Lynn, Johnny Bush, George Jones, Forester Sisters, Connie Smith and Merle Haggard. Salute!

Thursday, October 29, 2009

Dita and Doxies

Miss Von Teese gets triple points: 1. No tan; 2. Red lipstick at the pool; 3. Two pet dachshunds. PERFECTION!